Last Friday, I sent my first little story project, Broken Robot, to a small group of close friends and family members.To be honest, I felt kind of nervous, but I stomped through the doubts, wrote a heartfelt, semi-sentimental introductory email and sent Broken Robot off to his first audience. Everyone I've talked to loved it and had lots of positive things to say about it.
I should be happy about all this, and I am.
However, in order to prevent burn out, I'm taking a break from Broken Robot for a bit, which leaves me without a project. Life without a project means life without motivation and structure and purpose It means sitting on the couch, staring off into space wondering what to do with yourself. It means feeling like I've failed at life because I didn't make anything today.
You can see why this state of being could be problematic. It's one of the difficulties of not having an outside job; no projects basically equals unemployment plus apathy. Everything becomes difficult, including writing this blog post.
I'm not saying all this because I have some wonderful "cure your lack of inspiration in 6 simple steps" deal. This emotional phase is part of the artistic process, just like the super motivated, euphoric "idea high" you get when you first start an art project. Realizing this took me awhile, but now that I know it I'm (getting) better about not spiraling into a hopeless despair. And, to be honest, times like these force me to accept that I am more than the sum of my accomplishments. I know that in my head, but I am still learning to believe it.
So yeah, I'm trying to make the most of this "in between time". I've been working on my drawing basics; facial expressions, body types, feet and *shudder* hands. At some point, I want to post some highlight from Broken Robot. Maybe when I start working on it again.
sincerely,
me
